I love my friends, but they can really be a pain in the neck sometimes though that doesn't stop me from making new friends... I think understanding is something that should be mutual. I don't think that I'm a perfect being myself, sometimes I'm insensitive, sometimes I get way too self-centred...but I think that being able to put yourself in others' shoes is a big part of friendship as well. I try my best to understand, but i may not be the best at it. The sad thing is, feelings that you want reciprocated are usually being ignored 'cause of one's ego.
I have a HUGE ego (which I hate but can't control that well), but I do not expect everything to flow my way. If I'm feeling selfish at one point, I believe that I will come to realize it later, and then apologize. I'm someone who needs another to knock some sense into me at times 'cause I can get way too hotheaded, but I'm not afraid to admit fault. Something people don't usually realize... But what I cannot forgive, is when people take advantage of my consideration for my friends and turn it against me.
I must admit that I'm someone who definitely loves myself more than I do to others, and I think that applies for 99% of the people in this sinful world. But I do want my friends to sometimes realize that I think about them alot more than they realize, things might change through the years (I mean, no one will stay the same forever), but at least for now...I want to appreciate the time I've spent with every one of them. When in face of things that I can swallow, I will tend to budge. When there are things that I can't compromise on, I do hope that my friends will come to understand, and I will wait for them to understand. But when it comes to the things that i cannot forgive, I may choose to give up...as I've done before.
I think I've changed...but hey, it's all for self protection. I never want to weep over losing another friend again. So if someone doesn't care, then neither will I.
P.S. Loads of "I" in this post....that why I said, I'm self-centred!
